Why Pregnancy Can Be Equal Parts Amazing And Awful
Being pregnant is amazing. I mean, you're growing a human being. It amazes me that women can keep a little grape sized, beautiful thing alive every second of everyday and turn it into a whole human being. This tiny grape grows bigger and bigger and your heart keeps its little heart beating. The experience of this is all I have ever wanted and this whole idea seems completely... magical.
But nobody tells you is how hard it is to be magical. Sure some ladies glow like the sun and they feel wonderful from the moment they find out they're pregnant. On the other hand, there is me. I'm part of that club of women who are sick and exhausted from the moment they conceive. No sunshine and rainbows here. Instead, it's naps and morning sickness.
As I sit here just 12 weeks along with my miracle baby I can't help but feel immensely grateful for the most amazing gift I've ever been given. The joy is bittersweet and plagued by a slew of physical symptoms. I'm already peeing all the time and I can't lift my arms up without my boobs throbbing. I can imagine my latter months are going to require scoping out the bathroom wherever I go. Plus, I've already said farewell to a pile of too tight bras.
The emotional toll and morning sickness overwhelm me. From the day I saw those two pretty pink lines on a pregnancy test I was throwing up. I learned quickly that morning sickness is not confined to the morning. I'm one of those lucky women who gets to vomit all. day. long.
Hello heartburn, nice to meet you. I didn't know you even existed until you came on in the middle of the night like a fire breathing dragon. My body is sore, swollen, hot, and tired and I feel as pretty as a toad.
Through the week when I get home from work, I have many ambitious goals. The moment my feet step out of my shoes for the day, I am magnetically drawn to my cozy couch. Here, I will sleep until suppertime. I feel like I've never known the true meaning of exhaustion, until now. I trust the baby will further school me on this topic later.
I have always taken pride in my home and my surroundings and not having the energy to make it look the way I want makes me feel like I've lost all control.
My sense of smell has increased to super-hero level. Everything bothers me. One night all I wanted was tacos (must have been a Tuesday...). But I just couldn't make them because the smell of meat cooking is sent me to the toilet bowl. This made me cry... Enter here the emotional side of the equation, but that's a story for another day ;)
Each day I'm thankful to god for giving me this gift. I know this miracle baby is going to be so worth it. Every single rough day will pay off the moment I see my baby's little face. Or, even make it to the second trimester.
I simply can't wait to be a mother. I've waited for this moment since I was a little girl. But to pretend I am okay all the time is to make me crazy. Because I'm not. Pregnancy is equal parts weird and magical. Pregnancy is Hard. Period.
This is a guest post by April DeLong.
Like her name implies, April brings sunshine and brighter days. She is a Mom to be and experienced Early Childhood Educator . You'll see April guest posting here from time to time. She's got a way with words, with pictures and she's just plain genuine.
Sign up with your email address for news and updates